I finally put in a call to my LLMD today about my symptoms and how I've been doing on the plaquenil. She liked how I figured out to take it at suppertime so I can sleep through most of the yuck from it. She also asked if I was tolerating it. And I'm not sure.
Right about now, I've spent most of the last 24 hours in bed. I laid down when Lizzie did in the afternoon and just haven't felt up to being up and responsible for anything. I was up last night to eat supper and that's about it. This morning I spent time in the living room in my chair watching Labyrinth with Lizzie for the first time, and then I went back to lay down. I wasn't feeling well enough to stand in the kitchen long enough to make myself a breakfast shake or get my meds. I got up again for lunch and to go to the bathroom and get drinks. But I've been lying in bed, trying to remain entertained, yet resting. And so far things on the computer have been interesting, but I feel like I need to rest my brain. Sitting up in bed to give my body a different position while typing this entry is exhausting.
Perhaps its time to spend a few days with Grandma. I don't have another appt until Thursday, so Lizzie and I could go up there and she could be entertained and taken care of well, and I could just lie there and rest. And Jared can work and not have to do double duty. I'll have to talk to everyone about that. My only concern is the heat, how poorly I do in it and the sun and how there isn't good AC in the truck. Maybe if we leave in the evening tonight it will be easier.
Regarding tolerating, I asked the ladies on my chronic illness forum that I haunt ALLLLL the time, how they define it. One said that it could be looked at as looking for "permission to stop treatment" vs "reassurance that its ok to continue". As miserable as I am, at this point I'm still on the reassurance side. Another said that she looks at tolerating something by seeing if she can still take care of herself and the animals that depend on her. I'm just barely squeaking by on that one, but I can't really take care of the animals and Button. Others said they define tolerating a med by the benefits of treatment outweighing the side effects. This one got me thinking.....
In my case, the side effects are nausea, headaches, stomach pain, and sun sensitivity for the most part. The results of treatment are killing the bugs. Yet killing the bugs cause effects in and of itself. I experience increased pain in my joints, flu-like aches, feverish feeling, swollen, painful lymph nodes and exhaustion and increased brain fog. Add all of that up and its pretty miserable.
But do I want to continue to let the Borellia have free reign over my body? Do I want to continue to deteriorate and become more disabled than I already am? I give a resounding HELL NO!!!!!
It reminds me a lot of cancer. Now granted, I haven't ever had it, so I don't really *know* what its like, but I do know a few things. The chemo drugs are toxic and cause some pretty yucky side effects. Yet when you take chemo drugs, they don't discriminate and only kill the cancer cells. Every cell that is dividing in your body dies. And this makes you really sick too. Its a double whammy. Its not the drugs themselves that cause your hair to fall out, its the cells in your hair follicles dying. Its a result of the treatment, not a side effect from the drugs.
How do you choose when treatment results land you in bed and unable to care for your family? I guess ultimately, cancer patients know that if they don't treat the cancer, they'll die. Is lyme disease a fatal one? Not immediately, no. But the lyme buggers can and DO cause permanent damage to your heart and nerves and joints if they're left to do their thing for too long. If they dig into the wrong places in your body, the damage they leave can eventually kill you, a very long, agonizing time later.
So I'm at the point where I'm seeing the choice I have to make. I'm seeing what the forest I have to travel through looks like. Its dark and rather scary. But if I want my life to improve, I have to keep going.
Showing posts with label side effects. Show all posts
Showing posts with label side effects. Show all posts
Monday, July 18, 2011
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Second LLMD appt and playing with plaquenil
I had my second LLMD appt last week. I really would like to state that I LOVE THIS LADY!!!!! She is very thorough, and loved that I wrote out which symptoms changed. She went over my whole symptom list, the lyme symptom list, and a general body systems list in addition to a physical exam. I'm doing ok. Not stellar, but not terrible, just like I thought.
The fact that my lab tests came back negative does not change the fact that I have clinical chronic lyme disease. Nor will it change our course of treatment. Having a herx reaction right away cements that I do in fact have lyme disease, because they only occur with spirochete infections.
While going through the system check, she touched on thyroid. I mentioned my maternal history and the fact that I have several hypothyroid symptoms, yet all my labs have been within the normal range for years. She said, "Sometimes people have slow metabolisms and do better on a low dose of thyroid meds even though their labs are normal."
I nearly fell off my chair with excitement, because I have read that before, but had never come across a doctor who believed it! So, she instructed me to take my temperature 3 times a day and take the average of them. A low temperature is proof of a slow metabolism, and if I do this, she will be able to prescribe me some synthroid to try! I am SUPER excited about this prospect, because I have thought and wondered about this for years but nobody was willing to help me. So far, my temp hasn't even hit 98.6, even when I've been feeling feverish. Most of the averages are 97.5. However, each of my afternoon temps are higher than the others, which I believe is a symptom of lyme & co in and of itself. I'm looking forward to the next appt to see what she says!
Since I have had so much gastric upset and sun problems with the current dose of azithromycin, she kept it the same. Thank GOD!!!!! She wants me tolerating it well before we increase it. My stomach seems to be doing a bit better on it in the past week, so maybe next month it will go up. She also added in 400 mg of plaquenil each day, giving me the instructions that I can take it as I wish (they come in 200mg tablets), as long as I get the 400mg each day. I've been playing around with that, starting it on this past monday, because we had a big trip planned for that weekend. She suggested that I find a good refrigerated probiotic, as it helps keep the organisms fresher. I just started a new pack of 30 of what I currently have, so I'll do that when I'm done with this stuff. I seem to be doing fairly well on that front though. She also suggested I start taking chelated magnesium, for all my aches and pains, up to 2 grams daily, as I can tolerate. I'm still trying to find some good stuff.
The plaquenil is something fierce! It has caused me moderate nausea (its bad, but I'm not puking from it) and the bugs really don't like it. I have tried taking it a number of different ways. 200mg with the rest of my morning pills causes too much nausea. A late morning dose and early afternoon dose (without anything else taken with it) was pretty bad nausea too, and I ended up with the biggest herx I've had yet. Yes, its good, cuz it means the bugs are dying, but its also bad to have to endure, and the neurotoxins can actually cause damage if there is too much of them around for too long. So today, I'm trying out taking the entire 400mg with dinner, so I avoid mixing them with other meds, and I can sleep through most of the bad stuff.
Taking them with a big meal has helped with the nausea, but it has caused quite a bit of gas. Interestingly enough, I'm starting to feel my cheeks flush just 2 hours after taking it. Pretty soon its bedtime, so we'll see how I sleep and feel in the morning. I'm hoping its a go!
I really want to kill these damn buggers, but it would be nice if we can avoid a repeat of yesterday. I needed to stay in bed most of the afternoon and evening, and had to abandon making supper, right in the middle of things. I've been trying to be prepared for things to get worse, but now that that reality is looking me in the face, I have to admit I'm kind of scared. I couldn't take care of my family, and it was all I could do to get up to go to the bathroom or get a drink of water.
Today I've been feeling much better, my body felt lighter and I didn't hurt as much. If I can time the plaquenil doses right so they do the killing while I sleep, this might be a doable arrangement. I want them GONE, but I also want to be able to function.
The fact that my lab tests came back negative does not change the fact that I have clinical chronic lyme disease. Nor will it change our course of treatment. Having a herx reaction right away cements that I do in fact have lyme disease, because they only occur with spirochete infections.
While going through the system check, she touched on thyroid. I mentioned my maternal history and the fact that I have several hypothyroid symptoms, yet all my labs have been within the normal range for years. She said, "Sometimes people have slow metabolisms and do better on a low dose of thyroid meds even though their labs are normal."
I nearly fell off my chair with excitement, because I have read that before, but had never come across a doctor who believed it! So, she instructed me to take my temperature 3 times a day and take the average of them. A low temperature is proof of a slow metabolism, and if I do this, she will be able to prescribe me some synthroid to try! I am SUPER excited about this prospect, because I have thought and wondered about this for years but nobody was willing to help me. So far, my temp hasn't even hit 98.6, even when I've been feeling feverish. Most of the averages are 97.5. However, each of my afternoon temps are higher than the others, which I believe is a symptom of lyme & co in and of itself. I'm looking forward to the next appt to see what she says!
Since I have had so much gastric upset and sun problems with the current dose of azithromycin, she kept it the same. Thank GOD!!!!! She wants me tolerating it well before we increase it. My stomach seems to be doing a bit better on it in the past week, so maybe next month it will go up. She also added in 400 mg of plaquenil each day, giving me the instructions that I can take it as I wish (they come in 200mg tablets), as long as I get the 400mg each day. I've been playing around with that, starting it on this past monday, because we had a big trip planned for that weekend. She suggested that I find a good refrigerated probiotic, as it helps keep the organisms fresher. I just started a new pack of 30 of what I currently have, so I'll do that when I'm done with this stuff. I seem to be doing fairly well on that front though. She also suggested I start taking chelated magnesium, for all my aches and pains, up to 2 grams daily, as I can tolerate. I'm still trying to find some good stuff.
The plaquenil is something fierce! It has caused me moderate nausea (its bad, but I'm not puking from it) and the bugs really don't like it. I have tried taking it a number of different ways. 200mg with the rest of my morning pills causes too much nausea. A late morning dose and early afternoon dose (without anything else taken with it) was pretty bad nausea too, and I ended up with the biggest herx I've had yet. Yes, its good, cuz it means the bugs are dying, but its also bad to have to endure, and the neurotoxins can actually cause damage if there is too much of them around for too long. So today, I'm trying out taking the entire 400mg with dinner, so I avoid mixing them with other meds, and I can sleep through most of the bad stuff.
Taking them with a big meal has helped with the nausea, but it has caused quite a bit of gas. Interestingly enough, I'm starting to feel my cheeks flush just 2 hours after taking it. Pretty soon its bedtime, so we'll see how I sleep and feel in the morning. I'm hoping its a go!
I really want to kill these damn buggers, but it would be nice if we can avoid a repeat of yesterday. I needed to stay in bed most of the afternoon and evening, and had to abandon making supper, right in the middle of things. I've been trying to be prepared for things to get worse, but now that that reality is looking me in the face, I have to admit I'm kind of scared. I couldn't take care of my family, and it was all I could do to get up to go to the bathroom or get a drink of water.
Today I've been feeling much better, my body felt lighter and I didn't hurt as much. If I can time the plaquenil doses right so they do the killing while I sleep, this might be a doable arrangement. I want them GONE, but I also want to be able to function.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
A day in the life
Have you ever wondered what it feels like to have and be treating lyme disease? If yes, read on. If not, you can skip this post, cuz I'm kind of feeling like this is going to end up being whiny.
I'm feeling really rotten right now. My hands ache - along each and every bone and in every joint. My ankles and low back are joining in the ache chorus too. A few minutes ago I felt the need to sit down on my kitchen floor because standing up was just too much and I didn't have the energy to complete the task I was in the middle of (getting Lizzie some juice).
I'm exhausted, feeling like I could curl up and fall asleep at any minute. I'm counting down the time until Lizzie's nap, so I can take one too. I just realized my ginger ale isn't right next to me and I have to get up and get it, but I'm not really feeling up to doing that right now.
All of Lizzie's activity and sounds (constant chatter and singing and general noise making) is making me feel overstimulated. I had to tell her to go and sit on the couch instead of at my elbow a little while ago because when she bumped me, my whole body tensed up and I felt very anxious and crowded.
I feel like I'm going to puke or have diarrhea, alternately (medication side effects). My lymph nodes ache and I'm feeling chilled. Yesterday I felt like my cheeks were flushed and I was feverish. This is GOOD news, as it is a herx reaction, so it means I'm killing the buggers! But it still feels like the flu. Thankfully its pretty mild.
All this together makes me want to hide in bed and sleep. But, I'm a mom and have a 3 year old to keep busy and out of trouble and a house that is begging for attention. So I can't quite run off. Maybe throwing a blanket over my head and body might create the illusion of hiding for a few seconds. I should try it!
I'm feeling really rotten right now. My hands ache - along each and every bone and in every joint. My ankles and low back are joining in the ache chorus too. A few minutes ago I felt the need to sit down on my kitchen floor because standing up was just too much and I didn't have the energy to complete the task I was in the middle of (getting Lizzie some juice).
I'm exhausted, feeling like I could curl up and fall asleep at any minute. I'm counting down the time until Lizzie's nap, so I can take one too. I just realized my ginger ale isn't right next to me and I have to get up and get it, but I'm not really feeling up to doing that right now.
All of Lizzie's activity and sounds (constant chatter and singing and general noise making) is making me feel overstimulated. I had to tell her to go and sit on the couch instead of at my elbow a little while ago because when she bumped me, my whole body tensed up and I felt very anxious and crowded.
I feel like I'm going to puke or have diarrhea, alternately (medication side effects). My lymph nodes ache and I'm feeling chilled. Yesterday I felt like my cheeks were flushed and I was feverish. This is GOOD news, as it is a herx reaction, so it means I'm killing the buggers! But it still feels like the flu. Thankfully its pretty mild.
All this together makes me want to hide in bed and sleep. But, I'm a mom and have a 3 year old to keep busy and out of trouble and a house that is begging for attention. So I can't quite run off. Maybe throwing a blanket over my head and body might create the illusion of hiding for a few seconds. I should try it!
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